When many things happen to us, we do not know what is happening with us at that time. In such a situation, we cannot solve the problem and continue to suffer from that problem. I used to do every work in a perfect manner from childhood. I did not like the half-finished work. My parents also used to praise this habit of mine. While studying, I used to focus only on studies. I did not like any distraction.
I used to do everything with 100% effort. Sometimes I feel stress. But there was nothing that looked strange. But by coming to college, my habit of perfectionism had increased a lot. Now not only in studies but I wanted to do all the work in the right way and did not like it when it did not happen. There were irritation and anger. In my room, all things should be properly arranged, nothing should be scattered here and there. I wanted everything organized.
Now, most of my day was spent in the investigation. It took me a long time to get out of the house because I was always skeptical about whether I turned off all the windows, lights, and fan switches. I always see five or six times whether they turned off the gas or not, but still, my mind remains restless, so I had to do all the work again. Sometimes I used to ask my family to check all the things again.
If they did not do that then I would get unbearable nervousness. I knew it was stupid but I thought that if I make a big mistake, I will be responsible for it. Now I was having trouble with my habit of perfectionism. I did not want to do this kind of behavior but thoughts used to come in my mind again and again. My family and friends were also upset about this habit.
I now understood that my thoughts and behavior were not under my control. The more I tried to stop them, the more I was stressed. My parents told my maternal uncle and my aunt told my elder sister that I needed a psychiatrist. My family felt bad after hearing this. They believe that I have no mental problem. It has become my habit that I will recover myself. Some time passed but my behavior was the same. We met my uncle's family again. He explained to us that this is not a mental illness but a behavioral problem that can happen to anyone. He showed us some articles from the internet and said that it is called Obsessive-Compulsive Disorder (OCD) which can be cured. I first came to know about OCD.
I was nervous to hear the name of the psychiatrist but I thought that I should go once. A few days later we went to a psychiatrist. I told her about my problem. She took all my information from childhood to till date. She diagnosed me with OCD and explained to me that there is nothing to panic about. She gave me some medicine and tried to change my thought process and my habit of perfectionism. This process lasted for several weeks. I'm fine today. There are No symptoms Of OCD. It has been about 7 years now.
Now I work in an MNC in Noida. But I observe that people are afraid to talk about their problems. People hide psychological problems due to shame (what people will say) or being labeled as insane. And keep on suffering, due to which the problem increases further. This attitude adds to the problem rather than reduces it. Me and my family attitude were similar.
When my aunt advised us to go to a psychiatrist, we thought wrong about her but today I am happy because of her. That is why I am sharing my story with you so that I can become a reason for your happiness.
Personal Story: By Deepak Kohli